Fishing, Demystified.

So you’re looking for a break from the daily grind: Boss is all over you like a cougar at closing time, your woman discovered your other woman, and that sad paycheck makes Houdini look like a block party magician.

When life is hosing you down and flipping you off… 

What do you do when all is against you? Cast a lure, snag a lively sea bass, and settle down for a good ol’ fashion primal fight for life.
 

If you’re new to the angling idea or dabbled a bit when you were a midget at
"Camp Cuddly Pines," here are some of the basics from the poor man’s rod and reel to trolling the canyon’s of the North Atlantic:

1. Off the dock

The Essentials: generic rod and reel, cheap tackle

By far the easiest and least expensive of the types. Well known to you and me, because our fathers brought us here as part of that lifelong paternal lesson of fishing. Nothing wrong with hanging out at the local dock, just like nothing wrong with drinking by yourself.

2. Fly Fishing

The Essentials: fly rod and fly reel, fly fishing lure, set of waders

If the local dock isn’t far away enough or if you’re a land locked resident. Try fly-fishing at the closest river. Of all the sport fishing, this takes the most skill as it includes both rhythm and precision to mimic fly-bait on the water. But be sure to check you’re not wading around the town’s waste treatment center. Three-eyed fish are only good in photos, not on your hook.

3. Surf Casting

The Essentials: surf rod, reel, terminal tackle, waders

For those who live near the ocean, this is your ticket to freedom. Grab yourself a 4-wheel drive vehicle, beach pass, and make like Burt Reynolds in Canon Ball Run. After you’ve spun a few donuts in the sand and caused irreparable harm to our coastline, find a spot and cast a line into the waters. With a little luck and patience you might strike a good tug from a bass, fluke or even weak fish (sea trout).

4. Off the Boat

The Essentials: generic rod and reel, tackle, and a BOAT

No my friend, this is not an analogy to illegal immigrants entering our country by means of ocean going vessels. This is far less life threatening and not to mention, legal. If you’ve got the money, pick up a boat (~$25,000.00), gas it up ($300.00) and head on out into the wild blue yonder and catch a nice blue fish (that sell for $5.00 at the local fish market). Just remember, fishing is all about the experience.

5. Trolling

The Essentials: testicles and cash

Want a true, man vs. nature fight? Go wrestle a hungry grizzly bear. Or, grab a few buddies, and charter a boat to take you to the canyons, even the Outer Banks. We’re talking a serious 5-8 hour cruise destined to the deepest parts of the ocean where the big game tuna and marlin are bountiful. Once hooked, the fight can be long and arduous, almost epic, as you’re locked into a battle of wills against a relentless creature of nature who can weigh almost as much as you do . . . And that my friend . . . would be the beginning of your very first fish story. Even if all it was, was a nibble on the line by a small porgy.